and yes... the world's biggest goof has pulled off something better. i totally smacked a ceiling beam at delta stadium. muthafark. it's like the unstoppable force hitting the immovable object, where i totally felt like i got clotheslined (by a fucking beam). and yes... i fucking fell on my ass after tt. good thing noone saw tt (altho i did see a girl sitting at the grandstand. troy i think). hurhur. safe. HAHAHA... sorry la. enthu to change like superman behind the pillar. they should put a bloody sign stating low clearance for ppl like me. now i haf a bloody big bruise on my forehead. and yes.. somehow my bloody jaw hurts even tho my forehead took most of the impact. ouch.

hurhur... my god... i totally suck as a winger. totally CMI sial. every ball i get i bungle. haha.... even thinesh was calling me a bloody blur piece of shit. it's like i see him in the open but i pass the damn ball into the opponent. HUR. i hope siva puts me as a right half or something... tt's one position i've gotten used to playing. and i haf no speed... no stamina. so why the hell he puts me as left wing i don't know hahah. but yeah... good experience. at least i know my weakness is tt i cannot release the ball fast enough.

till next training... and when my head stops throbbing


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hai. why did i go for hockey training today. i was so tired and all. reached home from the chalet at 7:30am only to have 15 minutes to rush to sch. (had to shower and brush my teeth there too)

why did i snap at jamie during the game? he didn't do anything wrong. why am i using exhaustion as a bloody excuse to snap at ppl? ain't right. ain't right at all. it's not as if he wasn't trying during the match. not as if i did alot during the match myself... i'm not even good in the game, so who the fuck gave me the right to scold ppl for making mistakes?

messed up. i'm real messed up. yeah. tho he won't read this, but i'm feeling really guilty and all. and yes... i must really thank mark toh for organising the chalet... even tho it wasn't tt smooth w/ us freeloading and some of us being quite lousy guests. hmmm... guess some of the ppl gave positive feedback for improving. if u're doing it again next year it'll definitely be better yeah

hmmm. maybe i'm a fucker. maybe i am yeah.

it's friday. mark's bbq is on sunday. and all of a sudden $20 seems like a fucking large amt of $$ for some ppl to pay to stay over and talk cock yeah. i realli hate to say this. don't know... even zameer and hong are ok with $20. it's not like $20 will kill them off. a BBQ worth 4 half-assed value meals at mcdonalds might seem more attractive to some. but hey... 4 value meals can mean 2 dates with a girl... so why not.

why the hell i asked victor to persuade joshua to go when he already said he doesn't wanna go i don't know. hmmm, maybe i thought that this is one chance to talk to him since he's always busy with his gf and other shit. but i guess i'm being a fucker by half ass forcing him to actually turn up and pay $20 yeah. hey, maybe i think i'm his fren when i'm not. yeah... since like he onli looks for me when he needs computer stuff yeah.

i realli hate to lambast ppl now... been trying to tell myself not to lose my temper anymore. but hey... it's worth a mention yeah. i'm just like the backup for ppl. when ur frens aren't around, then u call me yeah. else i'll just stone at home and be a loser.

-- angsty entry. motherfuck.

"St Joseph's Institution has lined up four adventure camps and expeditions to various parts of Malaysia, including Sabah, for about 500 Secondary 2 and Secondary 3 boys.

They will be camping, trekking and climbing mountains, which should 'also help them to prepare for national service', said principal Lui Seng Cheong."

"Thirty students from St Andrew's Junior College are off to one of the poorer provinces in Thailand, Udon Thani in the north-east, to help build homes for poor families with non-profit group Habitat For Humanity."

article here

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH.
PW Oral Pres is over. good thing mdm habibah was there... else i'd probably die of nervousness again (i haf a problem with speaking infront of crowds... no matter how familiar i am with them) and the other woman insisted i was making faces at her (she musta thought i was flirting with her too huh... LOL) oh well... just feel bad that i kinda killed my group w/ my stupid actions. mouse shit (in chinese)

and good thing mdm habibah saved my group's ass from a major penalty as a result of that... man i realli owe her big time. she's been so damn nice to me all year round and i showed my gratitude by dropping geography altogether. why am i such a fucking letdown i don't know... but yeah... life ain't exactly going right for me anyways. "friends" are backstabbing me all over the place (YES AND I KNOW WHO YOU ARE) while i'm making alot of wrong decisions.

oh well... PW's gonna end soon... hope i can realli get down to training to run with zameer. need to improve on fitness desperately. it's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.

+ =

retarded day. left my stick and shoe bag at home and wen to sch, then only to leave my keys and pencil case in sch and come home. man... life already sucks as it seems... and now this.

side note: i'm feeling like one major SOB for not talking to her for such a long time. then again... i'm wondering if i should write a card to her during christmas cuz starting a conversation in sch all of a sudden just seems... weird. hmmm....

been over a week since i last posted. so yeah.

yesterday was kaiyun's birthday.
today is jinfeng's birthday.
tomorrow is adrean's birthday.

and i have no presents for ANY of them. i feel guilty and like a bloody cheapskate.
esp after sam's birthday passed and i never got her anything (at least she gave me something for mine).

it's shameful yeah... next monday is shuting's b'day... so i better get something.
the 18th marks debbie's b'day. must get something for her also, esp since i've known her since primary sch hurhur. else i should realli "bite shit and die"

man... everyone's a november kid. muahaha. kiddies :D